Thursday, September 30, 2010

Sorry it's been so long

I have been really bad about updating my blog. I am in my third trimester now. The home stretch. In 11 weeks Ella will be here, if not before then. This pregnancy has really been a lot easier than I thought. When we first got Ella's diagnosis I wasn't sure how hard it would be to carry her to term. But it really hasn't been as bad as I had feared. I was nervous about people who don't our situation asking me questions about my pregnancy and that it might be hard to find the answers. But really it hasn't been. When strangers ask questions like "when are you due" or "do you know what you are having", I answer them. " I am due in December with a baby girl." Most people I know know about our situation whether from facebook, or my blog, or just word of mouth. Everyone has been so supportive and great. They always give me a hug and tell me they are praying for Ella and our family. Although I have to admit a time or two I have seen people in the store that I know and I am not sure whether they know about Ella or not and I panic and run the other way! So if you have seen me in Wal-Mart and it looks as if I am running from you it's not because I don't like you, it's just that I can't talk about it right then.

I finally contacted the funeral home and talked to them about all of our options when she is gone. I just need to make an appointment to go in and finalize the arrangements and prepay so once she is born all we have to do is make a phone call and everything will be taken care of. We have decided to have her cremated. We don't own any burial plots anywhere and even though the funeral home said there are several cemeteries that offer plots free of charge for infants we have decided against burring her. We are young and who knows where we will be in the future. I hate the thought of moving one day and leaving her behind. So she will be cremated and whenever Jacob or I pass away her ashes will be put in our casket with us.

My next doctor's appointment is next Tuesday. After that I will start going every two weeks instead of four. I am starting to get to that point in my pregnancy where I am getting uncomfortable. My back aches, my ribs are sore and I am having trouble sleeping at night. I know that's all a normal part of pregnancy but I was hoping maybe I could skip all of that this time. But no luck. I am hoping to do a 3D/4D ultrasound soon so hopefully I will have new pictures of Miss Ella for you all! As my due date gets closer I am really excited to meet this girl and finally find out exactly who she is and see who she looks like! I have such mixed emotions. I can't wait for her to get here but at the same time I wish this pregnancy would never end.


  1. I know exactly what you mean!! Today is Sammy's due date and he is not going anywhere any time soon. I am grateful it took 39 weeks for me to get as uncomfortable as I am but I am ready for it to be over too.

    I'm excited to tell the next stranger that asks "I was due yesterday"! People have been freaked out enough with "next week" and "tomorrow" I can't imagine their response to "yesterday" or "last week". :-)

  2. My friend cremated her twins born prematurely. That is a really, really hard thing to do. She didn't know the best place to put the urn. Sometimes in the open and sometimes away in a private place. I think they will scatter ashes in a park later on. Your idea is really good too with having them with their parents.

    I think you are being wise with all these decisions, and that God is really guiding your steps and preparing your heart.